When it hits
by osk1700
Summary: The story takes place in a time where Izuku and Ochaco are living together. Izuku dies and Ochaco tries to cope.


**When it hits:**

She hadn't cried since she held him in her arms as he gave his final breath. His last words were, "I love you," before closing his eyes and going limp. She cried over his body for what felt like an eternity.

After that, she hadn't cried at all. As the police questioned her, she remained composed. As she received condolences from the likes of Asui, Iida, and Bakugo, she simply nodded. Even when she met with his mother; as the cubby woman cried in her arms, saying how sorry she was, Ochaco Uraraka still didn't cry.

Ever since the death of Izuku Midoriya, everyone had been treating her differently. As if she were a fragile piece of porcelain, and any sort of movement would cause her to break. Since his actual death, however, she hadn't cried once…and she hated it.

She didn't know why. She loved him, she knew that. She loved him with all of her heart, so why wasn't she crying? Was there something wrong with her? She was sad, of course, but she didn't couldn't bring herself to cry…she felt more empty and apathetic than anything.

On the day of his funeral, she thought that she would surely shed a few tears…but none came. As she looked into his casket during the wake, as she held his hand one last time, as she saw him lowered into the earth, even as she stood at the foot of his grave for hours on end, she still couldn't cry, she just felt…nothing.

The hero office she worked for told her to not worry about coming into work, telling her to take all the time she needed. She honestly didn't know why, but she felt like the time was wasted. She wasn't incapacitated or anything, she was still able to work. Sure, Izuku wasn't around the house anymore, but that didn't mean she was useless. So when she called the office a week later and said she was ready to come into work, it came as a shock to all of her colleges. After confirming with her that she was really ready, they told her to be at the office at 8:00. The night before she went back to work Asui, who worked at the same office she did, called her and all but demanded that she walk with Uraraka to work the next day. Seeing no other option, she agreed and told Asui to be at her apartment at 7:00AM. Uraraka set the alarm clock for 6:00 in the morning, and went to bed.

She was greeted in the morning by the annoying ringing sound of the alarm. She hated it so much, it meant that she had to get up. The silver lining is that the ringing would shortly stop and allow her to gain 10 more minutes of sleep before sounding again. As she lied in bed, waiting for the alarm to stop, she realized that it was going on for a little longer than usual. She kept her eyes closed as she slowly rolled over.

"Hmmm…hey…Deku…can you get the alarm please?" She had brought her arm over expecting it to fall on a well-defined chest, but was shocked when it hit the mattress.

"Huh?" She opened her eyes to see that there was no one next to her, her only companion in the room was the alarm clock.

"O-Oh…" she said. She got out of bed, turned the alarm off, and went to go take a shower.

The water was warm and refreshing. She could honestly fall asleep again if she wanted to, she giggled at the thought, remembering the last time she used all the hot water before Izuku had a chance to take a shower. His screams of shock echoed through the house. As bad as she felt, she couldn't help but laugh at him and his antics.

She sighed as she turned off the water and reached out from behind the shower curtain for her towel, only to find that it wasn't there. She quickly pooped her head out to confirm that there was indeed no towel.

"Shoot," she said under her breath, "I forgot one again." She then took a deep breath before yelling out "Hey Deku? Can you bring me a towel? I forgot to bring one with me into the shower." She stood there waiting for him to call back. When he didn't she continued "Aw, come on, don't be like that! I promise I've saved some hot water fo-"

Her eyes went wide…she realized that Deku wasn't going to answer. He couldn't answer…he wasn't there. She looked down at her feet as she held her arms to her chest, "right…silly me…I guess I have all the hot water to myself now though…" she said, trying to find a silver lining to her sudden lack of a companion.

She stepped out of the shower, grabbed a towel from the Landry room, dried herself off, and got dressed. She made her way into the kitchen, still feeling groggy. Only one thing left to do before she left for the day. She grabbed two mugs from out of the cabinet. One was just pink, having nothing really ornate or that made it stand out. The other one, on the other hand, had a picture of All Might giving a thumbs up with the words "Meet the morning with a PLUS ULTRA!" written on it. She smiled as she looked at it. It was the first birthday present she ever got him, and ever since then, he's used it without exception. As she prepared the coffee, she hummed a tune to herself. Once done, she took the pot and filled each mug. She then grabbed his mug before calling out "Deku, I made some coffee for you! Better come drink it before it ge-"

She gasped as the sudden memory of him going limp in her arms flashed before her eyes. She came back into reality when she heard a crashing sound. She looked down to see his mug on the floor, shattered in pieces.

"Oh no!" she exclaimed as she quickly dropped to her hands and knees, picking up the broken pieces of glass. "Hey Deku, be careful when you walk into the kitchen so you don't step on the broken gla-"

She stopped herself. She dropped the pieces of glass she had picked up back onto the floor. She covered her mouth with her hands, as her eyes began to water. She didn't have anybody to warn to be careful. She didn't have anybody to make coffee for. She didn't have to save hot water for anyone, nor did she have anyone to grab her a towel for the times she forgot to bring one. She had to move their alarm clock… _her_ alarm clock…over to her side of the bed so she could reach it. There wasn't anyone to hold her and tell her everything was going to be ok, or hold her hand, or kiss her, or just look at her with those green eyes she loved so much.

Then…it hit her.

She didn't have him anymore…he was gone. He was gone, and he was never coming back. This wasn't like an extended mission, or a late night at the office…this was permanent…

The same four words continued to echo in her mind, _"he's never coming back, he's never coming back, he's never coming back, he's never coming back…"_

" _He's dead."_

It came slowly. One drop, two drops…she hadn't noticed. But then suddenly, the dam that had been keeping her emotions held back broke, and a wave of grief washed over her.

And for the first time since that day…since that horrible day…she cried. She cried harder than she ever cried before, she wrapped her arms around herself as she bent down so far that her forehead was touching the floor. Her cries were primal, almost animalistic…

Asui arrived at the apartment. When she heard cries of pain, she ran into the apartment and what she saw made her blood run cold and her heart break.

There, Uraraka was, in the middle of the floor, shards of glass in front of her, arms wrapped around her chest, crying like she had never seen her cry before.

Asui raced over to Uraraka and enveloped her in a hug. If Uraraka knew it was her, she didn't give any indication. She didn't even give any indication that someone was in her home. She just continued to cry and wale.

"I WANT HIM BACK!" She yelled, "I WANT HIM BACK! PLEASE!" her voice was breaking in every place it could, tears running down her face she couldn't bring herself to open her eyes. "GIVE HIM BACK! IT'S NOT FAIR! I LOVE HIM! BRING HIM BACK!"

Asui was at a loss for words as she continued to hold Uraraka. All she could do to comfort her friend was to allow her to cry and let out all of her emotions. While the world had lost a hero…Uraraka lost something far more.

Asui called the office to inform them that both she and Uraraka wouldn't be coming in that day.

* * *

Notes:

So...sorry that it's a downer of a story, I got inspired to do this after I read a post on how to write a good death scene, so yea, theres the apology. Alright, thats about it, I hope you enjoy it.


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